Sleeping With The Wolf
By: Brian A. Yeager

This article is really a follow-up study to the previous article you studied last week ( In that article we looked at how it may be Scripturally acceptable to be married to an unbeliever (I Corinthians 7:10-16 and I Peter 3:1-8), but not necessarily wise for many reasons. This week we shall consider how marrying a Christian can be dangerous too. I know the potential of these two studies may cause one to wonder if marriage is good at all. After Jesus taught on divorce and remarriage (Matthew 19:3-9), that was the reaction of the disciples then too (Matthew 19:10). The truth is, marriage should be taken very seriously and the danger of marrying the wrong person makes the matter something we should approach with extreme caution.

There are many reasons not to marry a non-Christian. However, marrying a Christian is not necessarily an easier choice though. The word of God says:
“Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them. Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity” (Matthew 7:15-23).

From the Scriptures you just read you should be able to see several concerns about marrying someone who professes to be a faithful child of God. For one, there are those who are working hard to appear as something they are not (Titus 1:16). Secondly, there are those who are convinced they are faithful to God when, in reality, the Lord has never known them (Galatians 6:3). So, you have those seeking to deceive and those who are deceived themselves. Coupled with the fact that only few are saved (Luke 13:23-24), that makes choosing a Christian to marry a really scary proposition. One could argue that with a non-Christian you at least know what you have. With an individual who professes to be a Christian, but really is not, you actually have something WORSE than an unbeliever.

Yes, In Many Ways Worse Than An Unbeliever

Let me first say that I am fully aware of the fact that no sin is greater or less than another (James 2:10). However, God says there are people whom HE views as worse than others. For example, a man that chooses not to support his family is worse than an unbeliever (I Timothy 5:8). So ladies, this would mean a lazy man who does not work but professes to be a Christian is actually a worse choice than an unbeliever. An individual who starts the journey of being a Christian and falls away is, in the sight of our Almighty Father, worse than a person who has never chosen to begin the journey (II Peter 2:20-22). So, even if that were the only point I made in this article, that would prove that sleeping with the wolf in sheep’s clothing was/is actually worse than sleeping with the unbelieving enemy of our Lord.

When you fast forward a bit in thought, there is much more to consider than the surface issue of realizing you’ve married a fake Christian. What about the consequences now? Once the apostate state of a Christian is known you now are going to have to take steps against the person you’ve married. These steps are ones you would not have to take had you married an unbeliever. If your mate falls away you are going to have to, on some levels, withdraw yourself from this person (II Thessalonians 3:6, II Thessalonians 3:14-15, and I Timothy 6:3-5). Additionally, your brethren are now not going to be able to be in the presence of your spouse in social or spiritual settings (I Corinthians 5:1-13). How hard is that going to make your life?

If you marry a person who falls away you will not only be sleeping with an enemy of the Lord, which they will be, but also with one who is essentially crucifying our Lord afresh (Hebrews 10:26-31). How will that make you feel? As I type those words and think about the woman I love, I cannot fathom how much disdain I would have for her if she turned away from my Lord (Psalms 139:21-22). The sorrow would be perpetual (Romans 9:1-3). I do not even want to continue down that road of thought, as just the thought in itself is unbearable for me. Brethren, imagine (or don’t) the reality. What if the person you love, as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:22-32), walked away from the greatest part of your life? It would have been better to have never shared that than to have had it and lose it! What you know about apostates would be an ever-troubling fact for you.

How An Apostate Christian Is To The Core Worse Than The Unbeliever

When a person becomes a Christian they are proclaiming that they love the Lord with every fiber of their being (Matthew 22:37). They count the cost and commit fully to serving God (Luke 14:25-33). We, who are in Christ, have stated that our new life (Romans 6:3-6) puts the Lord above all else (Colossians 3:1-4). Now, if a person can make those levels of eternal commitments, and break them, what do you think they could do with their commitments with you? If they will break their word to the Almighty God knowing the eternal consequences, how could you trust their faithfulness to you? The Bible says the person who falls away has an evil heart (Hebrews 3:12). What would that mean for their love toward you?

If a person can fall away from God through temptation (Luke 8:13), what might they do against his or her mate in a time of temptation? Why does God call the spiritually apostate adulterers, whores, etc. (Isaiah 1:21, Jeremiah 3:1-14, Ezekiel 16:1-42, and James 4:4)? When the believer departs from the Lord you have to question their honesty in all things. What would that do to your marriage?


I so wish lessons like this would not need taught. However, marrying the wrong person can carry great consequences (i.e. I Kings 21:25). We have to know that marrying a supposed believer is not a given safety. Sleeping with the wolf is a scary proposition (II Peter 3:17)!

Volume 15 – Issue 31 - April 19th, 2015