A publication of the:
Butler church of Christ
Our meeting location is:
201 5th Ave.
Butler, PA 16001
724-287-0628 (building) / 724-282-9417
(home/office)
Assembling Times:
Sunday Bible Class - 9:30 AM
Sunday Worship – 10:30 AM
Wednesday Bible Class – 7:00 PM
Editor / Preacher –
Brian A. Yeager
Check out the web site:
(I Corinthians 10:31 and I Peter 4:11)
For Christians the word of God should be the place where we look to for advice on all things pertaining unto life and godliness (II Peter 1:3). Unfortunately, many Christians are looking to bookstores for books on how to raise their children. The world is looking to programs like “Dr. Phil” for advice on these matters. When I begin seeing that “Christians” feel the need to look elsewhere for an issue God has already supplied us information with, I begin to wonder if some still believe in the all-sufficiency of the scriptures. God has placed a requirement upon the parent to raise their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4). The scriptures fully equip us to every good work (II Timothy 3:16-17). Therefore, as we will see, God has not required a parent to properly raise a child without equipping parents with a “how to" guide.
What Does the World Say?
As a growing T.V. show and a popular author, Dr. Phil (Phillip C. McGraw) is making an impact on many American households. His shows often deal with matters relative to child raising, marriage, etc. On one specific show Dr. Phil addressed parenting and the act of spanking a child. Dr. Phil’s website has the following comments posted about this one show:
“As Phil told Nickie and Brent, ‘If it's working so well, why does your child continue to push you to the edge?’ Spanking your kids may work to suppress his or her bad behavior temporarily, but it isn't a learning type of discipline. The message they get from being spanked is ‘I'm a bad kid,’ which doesn't help your child figure out what he or she did wrong — or how to keep from doing it again!”
http://www.drphil.com/show/show.jhtml?contentId=1012_disciplinedebate.xml
Dr. Phil has also listed the “cons to
spanking” on his website which are:
• “Long-term consequences of spanking can include increased aggressiveness, antisocial behavior, and delinquency.Dr. Phil does not stand alone in his views of physically disciplining a child. His views and that of other “experts” in this field are forming the minds of Americans on how to raise a child. Many in the world in our current generation almost gasp for air at the idea of a parent posing painful physical consequences to a child for something that the child has done contrary to the will of the parents. Dr. Phil and many others have a case in abusive homes, but in godly homes wherein discipline is issued properly they have an opponent in God.• Weaker associations for spanking such as a failure to learn right from wrong, subsequent criminal behavior, mental illness, and child or spouse abuse as adults, have also been suggested.
• Physical punishment can send mixed messages to a child and reinforce aggressive behavior. When parents model aggressive behaviors by spanking, they reinforce the idea that physical aggression is the way to get what you want.
• Spanking is associated with a poorer relationship between the parent and child. Children who were spanked feel less attached to their parents and less trusting of them. The more the child was spanked, the less close the parent/child relationship.” http://www.drphil.com/advice/advice.jhtml?contentId=par_discipline_research.xml§ion=Parenting&subsection=Discipline
What Does God Say About Spanking?
(Proverbs 13:24) “He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.” (Proverbs 19:18) “Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.” (Proverbs 22:15) “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.” (Proverbs 23:13-14) “Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.” (Proverbs 29:15) “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.” The scriptures quoted above makes God’s view on this matter abundantly clear. The rod mentioned in the majority of these passages, such as in Proverbs 22:15, is defined by Brown, Driver, and Briggs Hebrew and English Lexicon to mean: “rod, staff, branch, offshoot, club, scepter, tribe.” Clearly, in correcting a child God did not instruct a mere tap on the finger!
If I have faith in the word of God, of which I must have to please Him (Hebrews 11:6; cf. Romans 10:17), then I must believe that God has more wisdom in this area than man does. Notice a few scriptures: (Proverbs 14:12) “There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.” (Jeremiah 10:23) “O Lord, I know that the way of man is not in himself: it is not in man that walketh to direct his steps.” (I Corinthians 1:25) “Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men; and the weakness of God is stronger than men.” God’s instruction in the matter of discipline towards our children is just as clear as any other lesson.
Conclusion
(Proverbs 22:6) “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” When I was growing up I spent the first fifteen years of my life with my mother. She did not practice any type of discipline and therefore never had the respect of myself or my brother when it came to her rules. Her way of dealing with us was “reward them when their good, and also reward them when their bad a little more so that they know you love them no matter what”. Not living with my father for fifteen years, I then moved in with him. I remembered from younger years that dad would yank me up and “take me behind the wood shed”. Thus, I respected my father and feared the consequences of disobeying him. He had a look, much like my children say that I have, and when he looked at me, I knew I was in for it. I just wish that I would have had that all of my life. However, for the 3 ½ years of discipline, I can be thankful as it had a great effect on my actions as a teenager and still does today.
God is a god of discipline. Throughout the Old Testament that is made abundantly clear (Deuteronomy 28:15ff.). God is also a god who loved mankind enough to send His only begotten Son to die for us (John 3:16, Romans 5:6-9, and I John 4:9). There has to be a balance in discipline. A parent must reward obedience if they will punish disobedience. That does not mean one gives a child a cookie every time they listen to the smallest of instructions, but it does mean that we need not be one-sided.
God promises that a child
will not depart from the training a parent gives. We can have faith
in that promise. Children are commanded by God to obey their parents
(Ephesians 6:1-2), and God has equipped us to help them do that.
Teaching consequences in the home will prepare our child for making not
only good choices in the flesh, but good spiritual decisions as well.
Dr. Phil, other “experts”, and anyone else who says “do not spank your
child” are wrong. God has informed us, you have learned it, now become
a parent who follows the Lord if you are not already!
Quick
NotesThose Serving Today:
Announcements – Bill Graham
A.M. Song Leader – Mike Lockwood
Lord’s Table – Jay Wagner
Assisting – Serg and Terry
First Prayer – Young Jay
Closing Prayer – George Papp
Those In Need of Our Prayers:
Tony Sassano (going through chemotherapy),
Joan Croyle, Marie Glunt (a friend of the Papp’s who is suffering from
cancer), and Julie Rado (a friend of the Graham’s who has been diagnosed
with breast cancer.
Filling In - Mike will be teaching
this morning, Bill will be preaching, and Terry will be taking care of
Wednesday night as Brian is preaching a Gospel Meeting at Tomlinson Run.